RT if you like Cheez It

Costco is my only religion twitter.com/roto_nino/status/157…

When you’re in a pickle, stay cool as a cucumber.

“Let me be clear…”
~The Invisible Man, probably

Fun fact about me: I like to have fun.

Why can’t Jupiter and Uranus just join forces and call themselves Poopiter?

Bill Cosby, Private Investigator: “The Proof Is In The Puddin'”

All underwear are edible if you really try hard enough.

@kingkool68 Angels are in the outfield, Ghosts are dads

If you rip a movie, but never watch it, is it really stolen?

@AstickofGum yeah i was trying to tell mommy i was having a good coffee but in corrected it to OMG I HATE YOU MOM U RUINED MY LIFE

okay let’s get something straight, IE, I never want to stop the script for grooveshark and I always want to go the website even if unsecure

Sony 3D camera commercial “It’s got 2 lenses, so the 3D is amazing”…um, you mean so the 3D is *possible*?

I get annoyed when I can’t retweet either my brother or my sister’s tweets…