I mean, why does underwear even need elastic? It’s not like they’re going to fall off your legs in your pants.

@clarissa You’re right. But then situations like this happen with my wife. Guess who is pregnant in this photo?

@jgarber oh no! It’s gone?

@freshyill You mean I could have used your trampoline 13 weeks ago?!?! MAN!

@fugularity @astickofgum what this? instagram.com/p/qDXyurxzSj/

@nvite Can I get Nvited?

@brownpau I thought that is why you got Google Glass!?!

Holy crap. Snapchat had a scoring system? How does that work? #IJustDiscoveredSnapchat

I’ve explored every corner of Snapchat. Why is this company worth billions of dollars? #IJustDiscoveredSnapchat

Took a selfie. Swipe swipe swipe. And now it looks like crap. What do I need filters for?
#IJustDiscoveredSnapchat

@astickofgum @smellyice Poppin tags? Thrift store shopping?

@brownpau Did you give two weeks for your comedy job?

@tjmrees What’s up?

@anthonydpaul What is that thing?

@kurtwerstein Why? What can you do with it?

@brownpau It moved to a closet never to be seen again. Want it?

@aimatthias nice meeting you tonight. You mentioned a project management article?

@brownorama Facial hair aesthetic?

@ineverylanguage Like Kentucky?

Changed server-wide nginx conf file for my DreamHost VPS to limit number of conns per IP. Server rebooted. Changes then messed up. Wut?